This isn't so much a rant as a plea for help.
As I sit here sobbing over the Senate vote, I wonder if people know what it means to someone like me.
I have supported the Democratic Party all of my life and probably still will. Lord knows I will never vote for a Republican. But I see myself not voting at all for awhile and that scares me.
I manage an apartment building for seniors. HUD, low income. The entire building is on Medicare except me.
Being 56 years old, I watch my tenants as my future unfolding before my eyes. I see how many of them cannot afford prescriptions. I see how medical care eats up every cent they get every month.
But I also realize that if I get sick in the next nine years, I will die. With no insurance, my yearly medical care consists of a flu shot. Cost - $28.
I have no familial history of disease, no pre-existing conditions, no weight issues, no history of heart disease, specific cancer, nor anything that would put me in a risk category for anything. And no, I have never had acne. And still, the rates I've been quoted for private insurance are more than I gross in a month.
I readily admit Barack Obama was not my first choice. I did not think he was a fighter. And I see that as part of the problem with our HC reform.
But my despair is primarily with the GOP and that segment of the Democratic Party that is either corrupt or Republicans-in-disguise.
Yes, I know how Congress works. I knew the chances of the Rockefeller/Shumer bills passing was slim. But faced with the reality of their failure to pass, I am feeling pretty much hopeless. And I don't want to feel this way.
I've not sat back and just waited for HC to pass. I've called, I've written, I've donated money I could not afford, I've campaigned, I've voted. I've done everything you're supposed to do to be a responsible, concerned, civic-minded American. And now I cry.
What gives me the impetus to start all over again? I don't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I've already gotten emails from my children asking about this and I don't know what to tell them.
Today is a very bad day, and Miss Blue is bluer than she has ever been.